Dear teacher,

I know sometimes you may wonder why I do the things I do for my child so I just wanted to explain a little.

I understand that at your centre you encourage independence, and you rejoice and celebrate the things children can do for themselves. Don’t get me wrong, I have woohoo moments every time my boy learns a new skill or does something for himself as well, but sometimes, just sometimes I like to do these things for him myself.

mother carrying child

I know my child is big enough to walk through the gate himself. With his feet dangling below my knees as I appear to struggle through the door carrying bags and lunchboxes, jackets, a cuddly bunny and my car keys, it might make for a ridiculous sight but I want you to know something. I am not struggling. Well perhaps I am struggling in the physical sense, but this short moment where I carry my child with his ever-extending limbs through the gate and into the centre, is a time where I get to cuddle him.

I am giving him that cuddle I didn’t have time for this morning as I was yelping out instructions that would help us get out of the door in time so that I wouldn’t be late for that very important meeting that I am still going to be late for regardless.

I am giving him that cuddle to make up for the sleepy “first thing in the morning” cuddles that we no longer have time for Monday to Friday.

I am giving him that cuddle that I didn’t have time to give him as he stood sleepily in his pajamas watching me struggle to find a pair of stockings without holes in.

I know my child is perfectly capable of putting his own bag in his locker, he is certainly tall enough!

But I am putting his things away because, well, sometimes when I am at work I miss doing things for him like other mothers who are fortunate enough to stay at home with their children.

I am putting his things away because I know that he will be responsible for putting his things away all day while I am not with him, and he will have a lifetime of putting his things away ahead of him.

I am putting his things away because all morning I have been reminding him to put his things away. I would like to do it this one time before I leave so that he can race over to say hi to his friends.

I am putting his things away so I can double-check that I put a spare change of clothes in his bag and that his cuddly bunny hasn’t dropped on the floor and swept into the busyness of the centre.

I know my child can take the lid off his yogurt himself as he joins the rolling morning tea table, I know this because he reminds me every single day.

But I want to take the lid off his yoghurt before I leave because a part of me thinks that a mother shows her love for her child by feeding him.

I want to take the lid off his yogurt because doing little things for my boy, is my way of showing him that I love him.

You see, while my son is having a fun-filled day at your centre and I am sitting in my office, a little part of me wishes I was there to see all of the amazing things he is doing. All of the little ways he is being independent, growing up, and becoming his own person. I wish he was with me so I could give him all of those cuddles I squeezed into our short walk from the car to the front door of your centre. I know that you will give him all of the cuddles he needs during the day, and you will do little things for him too. I love that you love him! But those little things you may think I don’t need to do for him in the morning, I kind of do need to do. It’s my way of showing him that I love him to the moon and back. And you can bet that when we get home tonight, I will be encouraging him to do the same things independently that you encourage him to do because I too value his independence.

Yours truly,

A mother

PS You can also bet I will give him 20 kisses before I leave too, because, well that’s just what mothers do.

Posted by Sonya McIntyre

Sonya was born in Lower Hutt and went to Rata Street Kindergarten and Petone Kindergarten. A qualified ECE, she studied at Victoria University in Wellington and has worked with home-based educators, in community-based childcare and in kindergarten. With childhood memories of reading books and writing stories, combined with her passion for all things social media, Sonya segued into her role with us at Storypark as social media manager.

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One Comment

  1. Such a beautiful open letter! This couldn’t have been better.


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